Recent content by Bulldog Wrestler

Sorry I'm late. I sat on my bed in a robe for 30 minutes scrolling on my phone.

What’s made of leather and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe.

My wife has like 20% of a conversation in her head before she decides to bring me into it. We can be driving in silence and she'll just be like "and then we'll pick the kids up and go straight from there."

Having a little nap on the sofa before taking myself up to bed for my main sleep. I call that a snors d'oeuvre.

What do you call a detective who just solves cases accidentally? Sheer Luck Holmes.

Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve noble gases here.” Helium doesn’t react.

What do you call a walking mosquito? An itch-hiker.

Just got fired from my job as a set designer. I left without making a scene

I tried a non-alcoholic beer last night and I think I have discovered what my favorite ingredient in beer is.

I met a girl who runs a battery kiosk in the local park. So basically, she sells C cells by the seesaw.

Marvin Gaye used to keep a sheep in his vineyard. He'd herd it through the grapevine.